I almost threw myself in a speeding car around Kira roundabout now road lights.
Why was I going to kill myself?
Because I was tired of how I was feeling. The depression had taken its heavy load on me and the conversations with myself in my head were so loud, I didn’t know what was my original voice. I wanted them to stop, I wanted everything that was causing me the pain to stop. I wanted to be free from the hurting and the pain.
This wasn’t the first time I was going through this deep desire to end it. This was my second time. The first time, I looked at a knife and thought it would be nice to be found laying in my own pool of blood and freed of all this. (Toxic environments are bad for your mental health)
People say time heals everything but when it comes to depression and all its siblings, time without help leads to death.
Ever since I found out what was wrong with me some years back, I have worked myself to better mental health, to help others who reach out to me with such problems. To reaching out to friends lost and finding out if they are well. I have gone back to my creator and asked Him the toughest of questions, fought with Him like Jacob did and asked Him to rescue me.
A few years back rage, anxiety alongside depression visited. I read somewhere that physical exercise helps improve your brain activity and lowers anxiety while it helps to focus your body on that one activity at the moment, in the long run controlling your thoughts and calming your nerves.
Because I was rage-ous to the extent of boxing walls with plain hands, I took to punching. Got gloves and started hitting my walls. Many of my friends who saw them gloves in my room wondered why but I never explained in-depth. I was still timid to talk about my struggles. Even though I was already in counselling I needed to accelerate my recovery and added yoga plus some dancing. These were ways of expressing myself and what I was feeling. Letting go of the pain and aiming to move forward with good vibes offers but the activities I got involved in.
Today my friend Gerry Opoka with Zumba has improved a great number of people’s mental health in Kampala City, mainly those in Butabika Hospital. She has also seen what happens in the hospital and how little the resources they have to cater for the many patients who need the fitness classes she offers for free.
She has created a charity Zumbathon for mental health where all proceeds go to Butabika hospital and its needs for the fitness class to continue.
I will be going to level up on my mental health while contributing to the hospital that would house me if I ever relapse and fail to end it. I would like to be in a good environment when recovering and this is how I and you can contribute.
Come 13th October, let’s Zumba! See flyer below for details.
Please come through, we are all suffering with our mental health one way or the other and this activity will help level you up to a degree.
#MentalHealthMatters
#MentalHealthRelatedSuicidesAreReal
#DepressionIsNoJoke!
